Tuesday, 2 January 2018


It's no secret every mother suffers with mum guilt, What I didn't know is that guilt grows with each child you have.
Have I paid enough attention to each of them? Do they all know just how much I love them? Do they know I have no favourites and love each of them equally? Do I expect to much from 'I' because she's the older one?
Something that doesn't help the mum guilt is the growth of just how much we use social media now days, every little thing we do is documented for the world to see.
I'm a huge Instagram lover, I love that little insight into peoples lives even if it does make me feel like I live like a pig because every flat surface in my house is piled with crap, I don't have crisp white walls and bedding with a succulent on my bed side, I have washing piles that could give Dot and her launderette a run for her money.
As they say comparison is the thief of joy....

I'm well aware much of my mum guilt are things I've come up with myself and am convinced that's also how the world see it.

A few examples...
- I feel the need to add a disclaimer to my photos of 'I' and her really highly worn leggings because that's how she likes them and not that they don't fit in fear that other's may think I favour my other two girls and don't bother with or buy clothes that fit.

- That the world is bound to think I favour either child because they appear in more photos than the other one, truth is 'I' is of an age were she will refuse to get in some photos like the one with Santa this year and Doo's spends majority or her time in her nick nocks and I won't post photos of her undressed on social media or there's a pile of crap in the background and I fear being judged.

- I haven't cuddled 'I' as much as I do the younger two, when in truth it's because shes older now and doesn't want to do the cuddly thing.

- Even down to the way I dealt with things differently between them all, when really it's because each of them have taught me and helped me grow as a mother.